The Birth of Damnation

This post is the most read and commented article in this blog. Despite the prominent forewarning that I will not include the outrageous lines of Carmi Martin, most of the readers still questioned its non-inclusion. The obedient blogger in me succumb to their demands as soon as possible. Mention Carmi Martin to me and there are three things that come to mind a) Chicka Chicka Chicks (the former Chicks to Chicks) b) Dick (as in Dick and Carmi) and c) Fountain of Youth (Does she age or is her real surname Cullen?). The first two reminds us of comic timing, something that served her REALLY WELL in this movie. No wonder her scenes are conspicuously included in the theatrical trailer. Think of another actress who can pull off a humorous nouveau riche mother not named Cherry Pie Picache? (Picache’s Isadora Castillejos in Iisa Pa Lamang remains the peg for this character.) The last one, of her still looking fantastic after all these years, reminds us that life is unfair.

NUMBER FIVE: a) From wet market to Sunday market. I don’t want to be smelling like fish. b) Kung ahas siya mas ahas ako! Tahimik pero kapag kinanti – nanunuklaw.

First quote is reminiscent of pop culture staple jokes about the humorous differences of a rich and a poor. (Kapag mayaman, eccentric pero kapag mahirap, sira ulo.) Despite the English delivery, Martin still sounded like a hilarious social climber. Her Chika Chika Chicks stint is quite beneficial. The great thing about the second quote is that it provided another variety of the ahas line, popular in local films dealing with infidelity and temptation. Yes. Carmi Martin is still funny in the midst of rage.

NUMBER FOUR: Naku. Ganyan talaga kapag galing sa makating dikya, nagmamarka.

Just brilliant. Derek just came from an ocular inspection of the high-end resort club of Anne and Cristine noticed a so-called kiss mark. Nonchalantly, Martin cracked this comment. If this movie continues killing the box-office, then do not be surprised if more people associate mistresses to dikya and not kulasisi. 

NUMBER THREE: Ang mudo ay isang malaking Quiapo. Maraming snatcher. Maagawan ka.

Soak in its utter brilliance.

NUMBER TWO: Panahon na para i-pack-up ‘yang si Lucy Torres mo. Ilabas mo na diyan si Gretchen Barretto. Sabi nga niya sa Magkaribal, ‘You want war? I’ll give you war.’ Anak, ako na ang bahala sa red stilettos mo!

The full quotation of the incomparable Victoria Valera (Barretto) reads: “You want war? I’ll give you war. Sabihin mo lang kung saan at kailan. I’ll be there in my red stilettos.” ABSCBN has been peppering their soap operas with fantabulous lines to attract viewers since Iisa Pa Lamang and I guess it has spilled to their movie outfit. Bonus: (another Victoria Valeria line) “Oh, my dear evil, aging stepmother, I’m not just looking for any kind of job. I already have one. Now, I want yours.”

NUMBER ONE: Ano bang mas madaling kalaban, yung p*tang mahirap o yung p*tang mayaman? – Cristine Reyes / Pare-parehong p*ta lang iyon! Yung p*tang mayaman, original ang Hermes. Yung mahirap, binili sa Greenhills. – Carmi Martin

True.

Note: Photo from http://www.philstar.com