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Archive for the 'movies' Category

11
Mar
13

Movie Review: Oz The Great and Powerful

OzCAST: JAMES FRANCO, MILA KUNIS, RACHEL WEISZ, MICHELLE WILLIAMS, ZACH BRAFF, BILL COBBS, JOEY KING, TONY COX

DIRECTOR: SAM RAIMI

SUMMARY: Oz or Oscar (Franco) is a struggling magician who dreams of becoming a great and powerful man. His ambition got the best of him after his balloon crashed into a freak tornado. He found himself stranded in the magical place of Oz where he befriends sister-witches Thedora (Kunis) and Evanora (Weisz) who told him he is the wizard who will fulfill a prophecy. In Oz, he gets his chance to take a stab on greatness.

  1. Wow. The filmmakers behind this film have serious sets of balls to create a prequel to an all-time classic. Sure, it is not a remake but still. Just imagine the tornado of unfavorable comparison it’ll receive from both the critics and the audience. The Wizard of Oz is one of the ten films completing Hollywood’s Greatest Year (1939). Roll call: Gone with the Wind, Stagecoach, Wuthering Heights, Dark Victory, Love Affair, Goodbye Mr. Chips, Ninotchka, Mr. Smith Goes to Washington and Of Mice and Men. To top it all, Oz (and Gone with the Wind) consistently ranks in the top 10 best films of all-time. You now see the big picture, of what’s going to happen if the prequel turns out to be a screw-up. 
  2. To be fair, Oz: The Great and Powerful put some serious emphasis on modern special effects, one thing its predecessor  will never have. Oz, in this case, is quirkier. However, it still is not the same. It lacks magic. And music. Yes. Oz: The Great and Powerful lacks music and magic. More on this later.
  3. James, Mila, Rachel and Michelle are all competent performers. Franco, in particular, has enough chutzpah to take on the role of Oz. As for the witches, here is the deal, girl power is missing and the scorned women cackled but did not roar. Theodora, despite her abilities, cried and stepped into the dark side after Oz left him. Evanora is the stereotypical scheming b*tch, I mean, witch who just cannot handle fame and power. Honestly, too much female hatred. As for Glinda,  well, she’s the good witch who saw the goodness inside of Oz and ends up kissing him. No one told me this is romantic fluff.
  4. MUSIC + MAGIC = JUDY GARLAND. No doubt Garland lifted the The Wizard Oz to brilliant heights. Her Dorothy deserves a time capsule because it is one of those once-in-a-lifetime performance. Capturing the innocence and fortitude of the classic heroine, Garland elevated a memorable character her into a cinematic icon. That is indeed a special performance.
  5. Seven words: Oz The Great and Powerful lacks magic.

RATING: C+

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01
Mar
13

Movie Review: Jack the Giant Slayer

Jack the Giant SlayerCAST: NICHOLAS HOULT, EWAN MCGREGOR, STANLEY TUCCI, BILL NIGHY, ELEANOR TOMLINSON, IAN MCSHANE, EDDIE MARSAN

DIRECTOR: BRYAN SINGER

SUMMARY: Jack the Giant Slayer is a re-imagination of the popular fairy tale, Jack and the Beanstalks. Long ago, in the kingdom of Cloister Albion, a group of monk decided to use a magical bean in order to meet their God. Unfortunately, the giant beanstalk led them not to heaven but to a land of giants. Tasting the flesh, blood and bones of humans, the murderous creatures seek more people beneath their homes. In order to defeat the giants, the King of Cloister forged a crown made out of the heart of a fallen giant. The piece of jewel enables the bearer to control the creatures. King Erik drove them back to their place. The giants bid their time and vowed to seek revenge against the descendants of the king. Centuries have passed  and the magical kingdom is threatened once more after a simple farmer, Jack (Hoult) got hold of the magical beans and accidentally misplaced one of the seeds. To make matters worse, the princess, Isabelle (Tomlinson) is a prisoner of the giants. Jack, with the help of the knight Elmont (McGregor) tries to rescue the princess from the clutches of the giants and something more sinister – a corrupt human.

  1. The first fifteen minutes or so of the film discusses a made-up historical background of the magical beans. It is an obligation for the on-going trend of re-imagined tales to convince the audience their re-imagined tales. Think of us as famish fishes and the backgrounder as a fat, fresh and delicious bait. Once it captures our attention, the film reels us in – hook, line and sinker. BUT IS IT REALLY DELICIOUS? NO.  WE WERE SIMPLY HUNGRY. 
  2. Re-imagined kid stories are sometimes cool, sometimes fun and most of the time preposterous; but these movies are never exceptional. Substance takes a backseat and instead and special effects take over. From time to time, the movie elicits real thrill, especially in the second half, but like riding a roller-coaster, the blast ends when it stops. This happens because of its thin plot.
  3. As for the cast, Hoult and Tomlinson acquit themselves but the spotlight belongs to McGregor and Tucci. The latter in particular is such a delight. Think of his role as a cartoon version of Alan Rickman’s Sheriff George of Nottingham. McGregor looks like he’s having fun in the movie and it shows on-screen as he nailed his punchlines, perfectly.
  4. All throughout the first half, the characters are often reminded that battle with the giants is real and it ONLY became a legend with the passage of time. Well, there is an epilogue and it kind of ties with its EARLY constant reminder. Go back and read the gist because there is a clue on the epilogue. I liked the epilogue. I consider it a CROWNING JEWEL. Dammit. Spoilers.
  5. Jack and the Beanstalk symbolizes acquiring wisdom after hurdling tribulations. Jack the Giant Slayer is about a boy who confronted his fears (and giants!) in order to rescue the girl he loves. We can all agree, the movie could have tried to substantiate its narration. It is quite unfortunate  the filmmakers put premium on special effects. Though, the second half of the movie has enough thrills to entertain the audience.

RATING: B-

24
Feb
13

Movie Review: Beautiful Creatures

Beautiful CreaturesCAST: ALDEN EHRENREICH, ALICE ENGLERT, JEREMY IRONS, EMMA THOMPSON, VIOLA DAVIS, EMMY ROSSUM, THOMAS MANN, ZOEY DEUTCH, EILEEN ATKINS, MARGO MARTINDALE

DIRECTOR: RICHARD LAGRAVENESE

SUMMARY: Gatlin, South Carolina – two kinds of people live in this place, those too stupid to stay and those too stuck to move out. Ethan Wate (Ehrenreich) knows this well. His late mother made sure he understood the truth about Gatlin.  He has a plan: leave town and go to college. Things changed after he met the new girl in school, Lena Duchannes (Englert). Despite her apparent strangeness and satanist rumors, Ethan finds himself attracted to Lena. Little does he know, their bond has lasted a lifetime and a centuries-old curse is about to test their love.

  1. This is no Twilight. This is no Bella and Edward. This is BETTER than Twilight. Lena and Ethan is BETTER than Bella and Edward. I have not read the paranormance (paranormal + romance) book where the film is based upon but I sure enjoyed this better than Stephanie Meyer’s series. What sets the Beautiful Creatures couple apart from the emo bloodsuckers is PERSONALITY. Ethan is funnier and more sensible, plus he reads books – the Charles Bukowski kind. He frequents libraries and rocks Buddy Holly glasses which screams I’m-a-cute-literature-nerd. On the other hand, Lena does not bite her lips nor tuck her hair as often as she blinks, but more importantly, she exudes emotions. That she collects poems is also a big plus. So before people start to label Beautiful Creatures as the next Twilight just do us a favor and stop. 
  2. Ehrenreich reminds me of Anton Yelchin – an up and coming actor deserving of a big break. He carried much  of the film as Ethan doubled as narrator. Though not as good-looking (not the usual chisled and cheekboned dude) as most leading men, his charm made up for it. He shines in scenes where he dismisses the craziness of the resident school bitch and whenever he falls under the spell of his girlfriend’s magical relatives. Ehrenreich proves a teen actor does not need abs nor complicated coiffure to elicit screams from the female audience.
  3. Newcomer Englert provided a not-so-good and not-so-bad-either performance. Just enough not to irritate most people. There is not much she can do because of her character (surprisingly, the male character is far more intersting). Her moment to shine is in the scene where she came face-to-face with the villainous Sarafine (Thomposon). I thought she did not give her all. Quite a disappointment, for she easily drowned in all of Emma Thompson’s insane fabulousity. If YA female characters were grades, Lenna Duchannes is B- which is rather acceptable because Bella Swann is an F. (Katniss Everdeen and Hermione Granger are the A+ gold standard.)
  4. Scroll back. Check the cast. Breathe in. Breathe out. SERIOUSLY: Irons, Thompson, Davis, Atkins and Martindale. The supporting cast has a bountiful collection of acting trophies in their homes. Props to the casting director for assembling a terrific collection of actors. Irons is ALWAYS worth the admission – I can listen to his hot baritone 24/7. But it is Davis as the Gatlin seer, who made quite an impact. The incredible actress delivers once again her trademark dignified and resolute performance. Oh. I just love her accessories. (I did checked out a couple of accessories stores after seeing the film. Hoping to recreate her look.)
  5. Beautiful Creatures is a watchable film adaptation of the popular book series. Though the special effects are a disappointment (the lightning stuff looks so cheap), the performance of the lead actors made it more engaging. There is nothing special with the plot for it is standard paranormace at best but the acting is earnest. Benefiting from a host of seasoned thespians, the film is sure to pass the taste of paranormance afficionados.

RATING: B-

14
Jan
13

Movie Review: Si Agimat Si Enteng Kabisote at Si Ako

Si Agimat Si Enteng Kabisote at Si AkoCAST: VIC SOTTO, JUDY ANN SANTOS, BONG REVILLA, GWEN ZAMORA, SAM PINTO, JOLO REVILLA, OYO SOTTO, JOHN LAPUS, AIZA SEGUERRA, JOSE MANALO, WALLY BAYOLA, MIKYLLA RAMIREZ, AMY PEREZ, RYZZA MAE DIZON

DIRECTOR: TONY Y. REYES

Aliens invade our planet and human race’s last hope is a shaky alliance of three heroes: Agimat (Revilla), Enteng (Sotto) and Ako (Santos). Will they settle their differences before it is too late?

  1. So John Lapus’ character transforms into a pink Hulk and the audience are suppose to find this hilarious. 
  2. If Sisterakas is some kind of a Christmas bonus for Kapamilya fans, then this movie is for the Kapuso crowd – specifically, Eat Bulaga faithfuls. The Bossing humor, the Jose-Wally antics, Ryzza Mae’s popular dance moves and even the old and tiresome carabao English of Jimmy Santos is all for their fans. IT IS LESS EXPENSIVE IF YOU SIMPLY WATCH EAT BULAGA THAN PAY FOR A MOVIE TICKET BECAUSE THE EXPERIENCE IS THE SAME.
  3. Ultimately, this movie does not expect glowing reviews from critics or win several acting trophies, rather it aims to earn tons of moolah. Casting three of the biggest film fest draws in recent times, Revilla, Santos and Sotto is nothing but a ka-ching magnet. (Though, based on reports the trio was not able to dislodge Sisterakas from the top of the box-office.) I understand the male lead stars but Santos is a brilliant actress and popular movie star with a proven festival track record. I do hope she makes something better next time. She deserves it and we deserve it too.
  4. Product placement is one movie  practice that I have made peace with a long time ago. Shockingly, I never thought I’d find myself wincing all throughout the Sun IDD scene. There a number of product placements in the entire film (since Santos and Sotto are top local celeb endorsers) but the Sun IDD is the most abominable.
  5. Si Agimat, Si Enteng Kabisote at Si Ako prioritizes box-office earnings instead of focusing on character development and plot lines. True, movie-making is a business but it borders perversion if filmmakers disregard the more important aspects of a movie just to earn more. Indeed, this movie is an example of the grotesque declension of the MMFF to irrelevance.

RATING: C-

07
Jan
13

Movie Review: El Presidente

El PresidenteCAST: JEORGE “ER” ESTREGAN, NORA AUNOR, CESAR MONTANO, CHRISTOPHER DE LEON, CRISTINE REYES, RONNIE LAZARO, BAYANI AGBAYANI, BARON GEISLER, JOHN REGALA, IAN VENERACION, FELIX ROCO, ROI VINZONS

DIRECTOR: MARK MEILY

SUMMARY: El Presidente is a three-hour epic chronicling Emilio Aguinaldo’s (Estregan) political rise, his rivalry with Andres Bonifacio (Montano) and his struggle against the Spanish and American colonizers

  1. Filmmakers are often seduce to depict the entire life of heroes on-screen. Ironically, the problem with cramming everything is that the movie  leaves out several details and eventually loses focus. (Just like cramming for college tests.) Information overload should not be the end-result of watching historical biopics but rather critical learning. Personally, his rivalry of Aguinaldo and Bonifacio would’ve been terrific on-screen. Theirs is a tragic tale of parallel lives. One is a rising military tactician and the other a revolutionary who has seen better days. As their paths crossed, our nation’s future reaches its crossroads.
  2. Speaking of Bonifacio, the Supremo has been unfairly cast as history’s villain. The aging leader who will sacrifice the success of the revolution  for his own political gains. At one point, a tempestuous overlord threatening to burn houses of people with nothing to contribute to his cause. Excuse me but historical movies are supposed to make us critically question our past not make it questionable. I understand El Presidente drew inspiration from Aguinaldo’s memoirs, Mga Gunita ng Rebolusyon, but to innacurately portray one man to exonerate another is a disservice to our nation.
  3. Much has been said with the decision of casting an actor in his late 40s to play the youngest (28) president of the Philippines. Clearly, he is miscast in the role. Fortunately, Estregan chose not to join the exaggerated acting bug most of the actors caught in the entire film. Guilty as charged are Geisler, De Leon and Regala. Geisler, in particular. Every time he’s on-screen, I’m like, “Dude, stop it and relax.” As for Nora Aunor, I cannot help but wonder if she was included in the movie just so she can lend her superstar presence. There’s no question Aunor is a great actress but playing the young blushing bride of Aguinaldo is a stretch even for her.
  4. Hilarious facial hairs aside, the production is quite commendable. Though I can forgive the less than impressive fight stunts, I would’ve preferred it bloodier and grimier. After all, hundreds of bolo-hacking, freedom-hungry Filipinos will never be a pretty sight. I cannot help it, let us discuss the mustache. Holy hell. Enchong Dee in The Strangers got nothing on these guys. The funniest pairs go to Geisler and Agbayani. As for beards, Roi Vinzons’ wins it by a couple of hair follicles. What’s with big-budgeted local films and horrible facial hairs? Philip Salvador’s ‘stache in Rosario started the trend. Last year, another Estregan entry, Asiong Salonga, also featured some of the funniest fake beards mustaches. I cannot wait for the 39th Metro Manila Film Festival. Scare me more.
  5. El Presidente boasts a grand production but lacks ambition in depicting the personal and political struggles of one of Philippine history’s least understood power players. Instead of focusing on certain aspects of his long life, the filmmakers decided to showcase his long life. Tragically, other than a lack of focus, gross historical misrepresentations were presented much to the public’s disservice. Historical biopics should help us to critically understand our past not to distort our understanding.

RATING: C+

12
Nov
12

Movie Review: Skyfall

James Bond is the most successful pop cultural representation of the shared fantasies and frustrations on the lost imperial stature of Britain. The Earth remains protected as long as he has the licence to kill. Quite a lot of rubbish, considering the Union Jack has long taken a back seat in the superpower position to the Stars and Stripes. That is also true for fictional spies. Jason Bourne, the beefier and meaner post-terrorist attack brother of Bond, has stolen the thunderball from the more iconic secret agent from across the pond. In the aftermath of the asinine movie instalments at the end of the Pierce Brosnan Era, questions arose if Bond is still relevant. The durable film franchise replied with an unforeseen move, hire a blond actor and out-Bourne Bourne. Grittier than his predecessors, the Daniel Craig Era eschewed the debonair crap of the earlier Bonds. The moment he responded, “I don’t care” to the eternal question of the bartender whether he prefers his martini shaken or stirred in his first film, something special is afoot. He lost some traction in its unremarkable sequel but in his latest film, he secures his foothold once more and delivers one of the best Bond performances of all-time.

A disastrous mission in Istanbul cast doubts on the leadership of M (Judi Dench) and the entire British intelligence. The failure proved fatal, as former agent-turned-terrorist, Raul Silva (Javier Bardem), obtained a list of agents scattered throughout the world. Out for some personal retribution, he zeroes in on M. It is up to Bond to avert serious bloodshed on British soil.

For serious fans of the franchise, the filmmakers included several tongue-in-cheek nods to the earlier films. Exploding pen references aside, the latest instalment felt like a transition movie of sorts to the next chapter of Bond. That the means of threat of the main baddie is a list of information tells us that the Bond films have accepted the modern concept of global terrorism. That the quarter master spent more of his time on a computer instead of inventing cool gadgets, adds credence to the earlier statement. That it spent a considerable amount of screen time on the ministerial interrogation of M, questioning her abilities and the need for special agents, pushed the complicated relationship of politics and intelligence to the spotlight. This Bond film is made of serious stuff. This Bond film echoes the perils a nation confronts in the time of structured terrorism. This Bond film ushers in a more authentic hero.

Much has been said between the similarities of Skyfall and The Dark Knight. One cannot help but notice the massive influence of the comic book adaptation hit to Bond. Themes of order and randomness pervade throughout the film. The MI6 lose its methodical hold of the situation next to an unpredictable character prone to planned terroristic activities. Just like in Gotham, the heroes needed to alter their approach and surprise the villain with their own unpredictable plan. In addition, like the Cape Crusader, Bond has to die another day to save Britain. Resurrection is indeed one of his hobbies.

Like in the other Bond films, the antagonist is as important as the lead character. Bardem is one of the best in the storied franchise. He has the prerequisite physical deformities but unlike Scaramanga, it is not inherent but rather inflicted. He prefers cruel mind games as oppose to the usual egomaniacal diatribe of his ill-famed predecessors. That he revealed his real face just once in the course of his interrogation is a proof of his preference for mental torture. (I am a fan of subtle film effects and the face reveal is both deliberate and efficient.) The buzz around Bardem’s character is his face-off against Bond where the latter’s sexual preference is put in question. Girls are another staple of the franchise. Compared to the other Bond films, the female of objectification has lessened in the latest instalment. Berenice Marlohe has a shorter screen time than the usual and the other female character is more of a surprise. (She had a view to a kill but did not hit the proper aim.) James Bond is the focal point of the objectification. It is no coincidence the camera lingered too much on his bare upper torso. That is one hell of a break from the past.

Speaking of breaking from the past, the film features a new quarter master. Q is a computer nerd with a sense of humor whose weapons of choice for Bond are a pistol and a radio. The people behind the film must be quite conscious with the recent emergence of a new breed of heartthrob – THE SKINNY NERDY BRIT – for casting Ben Whishaw as Q. The Benedict Cumberbatches and the Tom Hiddlestons have taken over the celluloid and Ben is about to take a piece of the spotlight pie. SPOILER: of all the character changes, however, none is more radical than with the top post. M has died and has been replaced. He has iconic shoes to fill but the replacement actor is more than capable. END OF SPOILER: the question remains if Daniel will don another suit and pair of cufflinks for one more Bond film. He has revived the franchise despite premature criticisms after the producers announced him as the successor to Brosnan. The chiselled actor has a prolific non-Bond career and will not suffer a terrible post-Bond profession. He should continue.

The sun has set on the British Empire but its influence on popular culture has not diminished. In music, the usual superstars had taken a backseat as one songstress set fire to the rain in the billboard charts. In the small screen, their dominance has spilled to the other side that the top dramatic actor is the lead star of Homeland. Not to mention the eternal Countess Grantham. In films, the Brits continue to snap superhero characters like a famished pit bull. But James Bond remains its most successful pop culture export and it is difficult to see its end because of its remarkable transformation and brilliant lead star. Indeed tomorrow never dies for this durable film franchise.

  1. On the homoerotic scene
  2. Ben. Ben. More Ben.
  3. I scattered FIVE JAMES BOND FILM TITLES all throughout the post. GO FIND IT.

RATING: A+

30
Oct
12

Movie Review: A Secret Affair

Mistress-themed films are the current fad in local pop culture. There is nothing original in the idea – like most fads; it is experiencing some sort of renaissance. Older movies dealing with infidelities feature the usual trifecta: the patient (or stupid) wife, the caring (or opportunistic) mistress and the misunderstood (or as*hole) husband. The current crop of movies still includes the same set of classic characters. Some people are complaining though that the torrent of mistress-themed films nibble on the moral fibers of our social relations. I am not a self-righteous moralistic nagger so am not one to believe their fire-and-brim sermons. However, I do think filmmakers should place a quota on the number of mistress-themed film releases, not for moral reasons, but for creative purposes. The dearth of imagination continues to pervade mainstream filmdom. This movie just might push it closer to creative blackhole.

I think CRISTINE REYES did not make the cast because she has a full schedule. Good for her.

I think DEREK RAMSAY makes movies to flaunt his tattoos. His recent career choices make him Eddie Rodriguez 2.0 – the original King of Love Triangles – but with lesser dramatic skill set.

I think ANNE CURTIS has proven that she has had enough of cute roles and out to make more mature stuff. But please be advised that mature characters do not NECESSARILY mean spiteful wives and scheming mistresses.

I think ANDI EIGENMANN is fortunate to still receive project offers despite the controversies she figured in the recent past. I also think she is a sensible enough to charter the course of her career better. In a manner of speaking, her role in this movie announces her departure from sweet roles. We heard it loud and clear so please take a different one next time.

I think JACKLYN JOSE deserves something better – much better – in her next screen project. (She figured in one of the b*tchiest and funniest scene in the film. The fact that she was still able to make this screen clutter a wee bit watchable is a testament to her enormous talent.)

I think JACKIELOU BLANCO is a forgotten actress and this film does not help her cause.

I think the movie features the MOST IRKSOME SET OF BARKADA ever. The combination of overdone colegiala accents and obvious hair relaxation procedures is a full-on aural and visual assault.

I think the scenes depicting the SOCIAL MEDIA TUSSLE of the lead characters are futile attempts to make commentaries on the destructive effects of social networking sites to human relationships.

I think A SECRET AFFAIR aspires to replicate the success of NO OTHER WOMAN and even if the intention was not verbalized, it is apparent as each scene unfolds. It is not improper to follow movie trends for box-office purposes; after all, movie-making is also a business. But filmmakers should at least make an effort to improve the trend. (Or start another trend.) Some people think A SECRET AFFAIR is better than NO OTHER WOMAN – not true. First, NO OTHER WOMAN is not a first-rate film. The characters are one-dimensional, the plot is ridiculous and the ending is terrible. A SECRET AFFAIR has the same elements that made NO OTHER WOMAN successful (b*tchiness and campiness) and dreadful (one-dimensional characters, ridiculous plot) but with a more subdued conclusion. Second, A SECRET AFFAIR is the clone in this equation and second-rate materials are seldom decent. A second-rate duplicate of a substandard original portends dire results.    

 RATING: C

20
Sep
12

Movie Review: Pridyider

Some people are born to pull-off the haunted refrigerator trick and some people are forbidden to recreate the ridiculous concept. Celebrated filmmaker Ishmael Bernal did it before in the original Shake Rattle and Roll. The movie could have been a disaster in the hands of mediocre directors but not so under the supervision of a national artist. Granted it is not one of his best, the memorable murderous kitchen appliance rests atop the pantheon of local horror films. It remains open to question but I consider it the all-time best episode of the iconic horror series. So I find it offensive to see a dreadful re-imagination of a classic. I need to confirm if there is at least one reasonable person who stood up and opposed the idea of creating this horrid mess. There has to be one or else the aliens should cease all operations of their Earth-intelligence research. The film suffers from a terrible plot, an assortment of forgettable characters, substandard special effects, and a most bizarre resolution.

  1. Horror films are often criticized for the ensemble of stupid characters making questionable decisions during critical moments. Lead character Tina is one such character. I understand her desire to seek truth behind the murders in her house but must she live there?! The house exterior screams total creep-fest but this fact is not enough for her to just rent an apartment or condo. The other characters do not fare either in terms of street-smart quotient. Most of them prefer sneaking up or make alarming entrances instead of taking the normal route of knocking on the door and making proper self-introduction. Scare flicks tend to approach the absurd scale closer than other genre but sensible characters need not be discarded.
  2. Janice De Belen is undergoing a career renaissance both in the big and small screen. She remains one of the more captivating and interesting local actors. If not for the ludicrousness of her character, she is the one flitting spot in this cinematic clutter. Her sinister stares are enough to inform the audience something is not right in her head. I guess the reason she is part of the cast (and the same reason she took the role) is an homage to her memorable turn in the original material. No one does demon-possessed refrigerator sexual harassment victim than Janice.
  3. In one of the earlier scenes, a cabbie reacted negatively to a radio report about the Brillante Mendoza film Kinatay. I do hope this is just some sort of a foreshadowing technique on the part of the filmmaker and not an out-and-out criticism because it does merit a series of face-palm if otherwise.
  4. Oh, JM. Please choose a better film projects next time. Your undeniable screen presence should not appear in movie clunkers.
  5. So as one of the minor characters devoured a plate of macaroni, some of the pasta turned into animal innards – I see, going the grossed-out horror route. Still not successful. If  one tries the crude stuff then go insane and add crass slurping sounds.
  6. But if the grossed-out scenes do not pan out then special effects should do the trick. Still not the case because it includes: a dismembered hand with fangs and intestine-like thingies sprouting from the ref. The lone reason I can think off  the intestine-like things could work is if it engages the lead female character into a horrible tentacle sex.
  7. I once listened to a podcast discussing the reasons people like horror films. One of the explanation put forth is that it provides people a demonstration of the actions and reactions of humans in case it happens in real life. Seems legit. If that is the case then please find another film if refrigerators start acting strange.
  8. The filmmakers  should offer the public an explanation for creating this mess. People must be held responsible for their incompetence at all times.
  9. Spoiler: to eradicate a hell portal underneath a refrigerator use a banal na bomba. That should stop people from checking this film out.

RATING: D

13
Sep
12

Movie Review: The Mistress

Melodrama is back. The blockbuster hit No Other Woman cleared the path for its return paving a more acceptable passage for the likes of Yesterday Today and Tomorrow. Come to think of it – melodrama never left. Mano Po carried the torch throughout the past decade (even if it was an annual affair). In between  hundreds of horror films and  thousands of romantic comedies  Star Cinema releases a couple of melodramatic fares. But since hitting the  pot of gold with No Other Woman, it is a safe bet the film production giant will release more from the much-missed genre (at least IN MY CASE I missed it a lot). Its latest offering, The Mistress, stars the bankable pair-up of John Lloyd Cruz and Bea Alonzo, touted to be the latter’s most daring screen project to date. It is also the comeback movie of the great Hilda Koronel. In one interview, the actress admitted the story  lured her back to acting, “It has to be touching, it has to move me. Kapag binabasa ko ‘yung script na ‘yan kailangan nararamdaman ko’ yung emotion na tumatakbo dun sa script lalo na ‘yung mga dialogue. Kailangan habang sinasabi ko ‘yun maiiyak ba ako o hindi, something like that, nararamdaman ko dapat.”  I did not shed tears last night but had a number of stifled shrieks during confrontation scenes.  Pulling strength from its lead stars, The Mistress is reminiscent of the melodramas of the past featuring complicated relationships, delicious lines but without the usual face-slapping and hair-pulling scenes.

(I promise a spoiler-free post so no film recap here.)

Cruz is often compared to his (admit it) look-alike Dindo Fernando. Like Fernando, he is not the chiseled-face and abs-sculpted leading man most movie stars are but his talent and charisma carries him through a mind-blogging box-office streak. Cruz banners six of the ten highest-grossing local films - a movie ka-ching shoo-in if there is one. Though his record attests he can be paired with different leading ladies, his team-up with Alonzo is just more magical. (Just ask the millions of One More Chance fanatics out there.) The magic continues in The Mistress despite inhabiting  more mature characters. Most of the positive reaction from the audience were during their scenes together and the reason is a no-brainer – SCREEN CHEMISTRY. These kids just look good together and the kind of stuff no acting school can ever teach.

Also noticeable is the improvement in Alonzo’s speaking voice. Her voice used to sound like its about to break into sobs but that has been lessened. As the titular character, she did a competent job as a lover, mistress, daughter and granddaughter. (I had to include the granddaughter part because I loved her scenes with Anita Linda who is both delightful and heartbreaking as her grandmother.) Just one thing: Bea tends to stare open-mouthed in some of her scenes and it is kind off-putting but other than that she proved her acting mettle once more.

“He is with her every Thursday, every f*ckin’ Thursday f*ckin’ her!” Hilda Koronel delivered the line with equal parts relish and spite in the middle of a drunken marathon and am like, “More of her please! More Hilda!” Not a speck of acting rust afflicts this incredible actress.  The best scene: an inebriated Koronel about to fall asleep but not before revealing an old secret. There she is scared, guilt-ridden and in a dramatic high all of sudden dropping a punchline. Her impressive dramatic stature has obscured her comic talent. I am going to spell it out: C-R-Y-I-N-G L-A-D-I-E-S.

The Mistress has its share of negative points including distracting theme songs, predictable plot twists and a so-so denouement. Let me elucidate on the ending: I like the final scene except for the sort of dream sequence. The process of knotting the loose ends is a bit of blah and too derivative for me (each of us has a different taste). It could have been better but the film remains compelling and should enthrall hardcore  fans and the general audience. I just like a proper melodrama and this is more than sufficient.

RATING: B+

POSTSCRIPT:

  1. The Alonzo-Cruz team-up is the most credible and formidable acting partnership out there because theirs is built on a no drama foundation. It thrives on their film output not made-up press release crap.
  2. K Brosas is hilarious. Her quips are just effin hilarious.
  3. Clarence Delgado – the uber-cute kid in the film – is quite the scene-stealer as Mamon.
  4. “Why Hilda Koronel Accepted the Mistress” http://www.abs-cbnnews.com/entertainment/09/04/12/why-hilda-koronel-accepted-mistress
05
Sep
12

Movie Review: I Do Bidoo Bidoo

Don Jaucian stirred musical hornet’s nest because of his article The Life and Death of OPM. Some Filipino musicians posted their reactions on popular micro-blogging site Twitter: some are tolerating ["Entrada, we have met. I hope you see signs of life, I am sure you meant no harm." (Armi Millare)] and others not so much [ "Psst   editors, you might want to control the crap your paper churns out; you wouldn't wanna let everyone know your writers are stupid, right? (Miggy Cruz)]. Dead is not the correct term to describe the local music scene because  there are still a number of earnest Filipino musicians dishing out spectacular original music.  I prefer ailing state (no thanks to the uncontrollable production of revival albums). I Do Bidoo Bidoo celebrates the music of one of the true icons of OPM – The Apo Hiking Society. The Studio 5-Unitel film collaboration is great reminder of our incredible  Filipino musical heritage.

Young couple Rock (Sam Concepcion) and Tracy (Tippy Dos Santos) are preparing for their wedding after he got her pregnant. The preparation revealed simmering insecurities from both parties stemming from parental opposition and social class differences. But there is nothing good music cannot settle.

TV5 top honcho Manuel Pangilinan declared I Do Bidoo Bidoo better than Mamma Mia. “That was an enjoyable movie last night. Better than Mamma Mia! This will be a big hit, deservedly. Doobie doobie doo!” True. It is indeed an enjoyable movie. I also hope it becomes a huge hit but better than Mamma Mia? Hold it right there. I love the cheesiness of Mamma Mia. There. Out in the open. I Do Bidoo Bidoo is a fun film but am not going to see it for a second time or mark calendars for its disc release.

But the film is one of the better recent local film releases.

  1. Santos and Concepcion performed quite well. Their singing parts more impressive than their non-singing ones.
  2. Neil Coleta is a surprise. (I am not going to disclose his role.) I used to think of him as just another iced tea ad talent but turns out there is more to him as a performer.
  3. Eugene Domingo is fantastic as usual. She is so believable as the stressed-out mother of Rock. It is hard to sing alongside OPM superstars but Domingo is made of incredible stuff.
  4. Ditto for Ogie.
  5. As the rich parents of Santos, Gary Valenciano and Zsa Zsa Padilla had some difficulties with their characters. Not that the veteran thespians are not capable enough. It is just their roles are not as well-written compared to that of Eugene and Ogie’s characters. (It is easier to appreciate the relationship of Eugene-Ogie.)
  6. Did the younger set of audience understand the terms burgis and chedeng? (Sa pagkain, siya’y pihikan/’Di lang burger machine/Ang sundo niya sa eskwela/Laging naka-chedeng/Ganyan ang syota ko/Class na class ang kanyang trip)
  7. Never mind the cheesiness. The level of cheesiness is acceptable.

I Do Bidoo Bidoo is not the best nor the funniest but it is full of fun and one of the better-made films out there. The people behind it put a lot of effort in mounting this beautiful production. It is both refreshing and reassuring to see an effort-filled project in a local cinema landscape full of  the usual drivel. That I found the non-song-and-dance parts not as interesting is not a problem but an affirmation of the greatness of local music. A great man once said music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent. Still remains true.

Keep on making films Chris Martinez.

RATING: A-




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